Looks like we're in for a treat today! The HyperScan by Mattel The same company that made the Intellivision and the Power Glove. They Hyperscan angry video game nerd avgn made every toy from Htperscan to Barbie. LJN made toys.hmm Let's see how this piece of shit holds up. It was released in 2006. It's hard to believe a specimen like this would exist Hyperscan angry video game nerd avgn a time when Xbox 360, PS3, and Wii were the are Sega genesis clone with hdmi recommend gaming consoles.
Nobody ever talked about this one. Let's find out why. The instructions are blinking. That's annoying. Player 1. scan your. .character card. You have to scan cards to make the game go? Having a disk isn't enough? Https://pikespeakpoetlaureate.org/download-games/how-to-playstation-3-yellow-light-of-death-repair.php about a character select screen?
That Hyperscan angry video game nerd avgn been fine. Scan. Scan you bastard! Scan a mod card now? What's with all these cards? Just start the fucking game! Goddamn! (crickets) The cards were sold separately so the idea was to combine card-collecting with video gaming. Yeah ndrd about fuckin' Pogs too?
Hyperxcan fact that you always need to be scanning cards means you have to keep the game console on you lap, calling back to the Atari 2600 days where all the switches were on the console. (crickets) It's STILL source. HyperScan.
Yeah it's really hyper. ("Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies" plays) After a LONG load process, that's only rivaled by the Commodore 64, the game finally starts. Well, it's a fighting game. A very average one. Average for the early 90s, but this much later.
At least you can say it's better than Shaq Fu. End it. I guess you're supposed to do some kind of finishing move. If only I had the card. I guess "finish him" is already taken so let's call it "end it." Then you wait learn more here another load screen just to see the character stats.
Hyperscan angry video game nerd avgn Like you're running on grease.
Then it's another load screen just to select the character. And then yet ANOTHER load screen before the next fight starts! Three, fucking, load screens between matches! Next up, let's try Marvel Heroes, you can already tell that the HyperScan was all about Marvel. Here you can apparently take control of Avenger characters as well as X-Men depending which cards you go here. It's a standard side-scrolling action game.
Hyperscan angry video game nerd avgn Looks like we're in for a treat today!
The graphics and sound are fair enough, but the control is kind link slippery. Like you're running on grease.
The attacking is delayed and the hit detection is terrible. UGH! COME ON! Hit him! Hit him! I also find it hilarious that if you hang onto the side of a building, everybody jumps at you like dogs after a cat in a tree! There were much better games of this variety on Sega Genesis. Nothing to see here folks.
Then there's Interstellar Wrestling League. It's strangely quieter than the other games. I never encountered that issue before where the games have inconsistent volume. Even the scanning is inconsistent.
This time it seems like I have to hold the card in place instead of swiping it. "My face!" Here we have a humorous fighting game with controls way more awkward than X-Men. It sort of reminds me of Clay Fighter with its comedic elements but instead nefd being charming, it comes off as just plain weird.
"I like pie! I like to have pie every day!" Besides, why are they calling Hyperscan angry video game nerd avgn wrestling when they're not even wrestling? And yes, he just turned into a cheeseburger. At last, we have Ben 10, based on the TV series. (loud music) It's another side-scroller. You take control of Ben and using the different cards you can transform into different alien creatures.
By the way, what's that? A Nintendo Wii? I like the concept. The graphics and character animations are great. This game could've been good! Almost awesome vireo half the time you're not even playing the game. You're just Hyperscan angry video game nerd avgn through text boxes. Use the jump button Hypersacn jump over the rock? This game treats you like an idiot! You can't do anything! Every step you take, the game pauses and another text box comes up. It's like Castlevania II: Simon's Quest, but multiplied a thousand times!
It's like they took the most annoying Hypwrscan of one game and made it the whole game twenty years later. This game is so recent, it came out after I already critiqued Simon's Quest.
Couldn't anybody learn? I was already eleven episodes in by the time this shit hit the market, in October 2006. The text boxes can freeze you in midair as you're trying to jump over a hole. When it unfreezes, you lose your momentum and fall to your death!
I'm trying to jump! Hyperscan angry video game nerd avgn me alone! Let me play the game! I can't read it anyway because they somehow put the text on the background layer. How did somebody let this get so fucked up? These Hyperscan angry video game nerd avgn boxes are your worst enemy and unholiest of gaming nightmares. FUUUCK! You know Click to see more played almost the entire library for it.
There's also a Spiderman game that I don't own. But that's five games. They made five games total for this piece of garbage! That's less games than the Virtual Boy! Well, at least it's not as bad as the R-Zone. HyperScan. Hyper fuckin' shit!